an open letter

Dear Christina Aguilera-

This is one of your loyal fans. First of all, way to rock Ozzie Osbourne's former house. I hope he cleaned all the dog poop stains off the floor in the living room.

I wanted to write to tell you that I'm a little disappointed. Ever since you taught me that boys had to rub me the right way, I've admired your balance of sexuality, confidence, and jaw-dropping vocal talent. In a pop scene of stunted vocal ranges and plastic packaging, I always felt that you were bringing the real thing. I even stood up for you when the big bad media (whoever that is) said you were "too sexual" as a new mother. I always say a mom should have it easy when it comes to that sort of stuff. After all, the baby had to come from somewhere, and it sure wasn't Jesus...

But I have to say, your new aptly-named single "Not Myself Tonight," leaves me a little sad inside. Of anyone on the market today, you're one of the few artists who is respected for pure, raw talent. You can sing, you have lyrics that mean something, you deliver the whole package. But now, you're all about the backing techno tracks and cookie cutter melodies. I couldn't even find a part of the song to put my hand up in the air in the "hallelujah" stance you usually take at one point or the other. You went down the Britney path, as I call it. A song that will be a big hit in the clubs and dance floors (which is wehre the money comes from), but nothing that lasts past the walk of shame. You're better than the Selena Gomez's of the world (correct use of a pluralized z? not sure), even if you both started in Disney.

So for the next single, make me proud. Bust out a sweet line that cracks wine glasses and forces me to stop singing along in my car because I simply can't do it justice. Step it up.