some things are worth exclaiming

It's the No. 1 rule of journalism: no one ever makes an exclamation. They don't comment, note, sigh, yell, or any of the other 18 million ways you're taught in elementary school that someone can say something without just saying "sally said."

So as a friend and I were driving through the parking garage at the mammoth-sized Towson Town Center (the closest suburb to Baltimore with the largest mall I've ever been in. Bellvue Square would fit in the luxury wing of this place), I was taken aback at the signs directing me:

"Lots more parking ahead!"

Normally, I would've made some cynical remark at how the world should use its words, not its punctuation, to make a statement. But for some reason, this sign made me stop and exclaim for myself, "what a wonderful place for an exclamation mark!"

How many times have I driven around a parking garage and by the end of it just wanted to drive off the edge of the damn thing and go home? I hate the claustrophobia, the frantic nature of the place, the feeling that at any moment some Hollywood action/thriller moment will hit and the whole thing will collapse on top of my tiny car. The use of this simple yet powerful punctuation gave me hope; more parking, and a pleasant experience, was just ahead of me.

So maybe, just this once, I can accept that a well-placed exclamation mark sometimes really does the trick. Just don't tell my students I said so...

For more insight, check out this Slate article about their overuse in e-mails.

for the next life

Things that I hope give me good karma:

-I try to order in full anytime I go out. I choose my side dishes, specify size and type of beverage, and pre-empt the "how would you like that cooked" questions. If it's listed on the menu, then use the information given to you.

-Let people merge. I call it my "good driver karma." Especially in Baltimore, where lanes end at any given moment when some idiot decides to just park in the street.

-buy coffee/beverages/snacks for friends. Nothing makes someone's day than "here's the delicious beverage I know you would have ordered for yourself but didnt' have time for."

-doing research before I vote.

Things I complain about even if it means coming back as a squirrel next time around:

-so called "start-up" fees for things like electricity, my new crackberry, etc. I shouldn't have to pay you to take my money once a month.

-serif fonts. Only about 1 in 10 are actually worth my time.

-Reporting that uses excessive modifiers and fluffy descriptions. Like this, for example.

-men with long hair. Even McDreamy length just grosses me out.

-abstract art. Some of it is nice. Some of it just seems lazy.

Putting the w in wtf

Apparantly my whole education has been a sham.

I learned today (learned is a strong verb. More like "was made aware that some people think") the letter "w" can be used as a vowel.

This is absurd.

According to a post on answers.com, "people in the state of Washington were not taught that 'w' is sometimes a vowel." The entry goes on to explain how w rests in the same consonant/vowel continuum as the letter y, when used as the final letter of a word, ie "cow," "tomorrow," or "few."

I decided to go to a more authoritative source, so like any good English scholar that meant off to Oxford it was. According to their online dictionary a vowel is "a speech sound which is produced by comparatively open configuration of the vocal tract, with vibration of the vocal chords but with audible friction." In comparison, a consonant is "a basic speech sound in which the breath is at least partly obstructed." It goes on to refer to the w as a "semivowel" because it is used in contrast to consonants, but functions like a vowel.

Leave it to Oxford to invent a third type of letter to justify an obnoxious technicality.

As for me, the letter w remains firmly in the consonant category, if for no other reason than my entire Wheel of Fortune and Hangman strategies are ruined otherwise. I mean, if Pat Sajak says it's a consonant, than who am I to say otherwise?

And for the record, my Massachussetts-educated roommate had never heard of this, either.

christmas isn't the only time for wish lists

This is one of the few times I'll cross the line between blog-life and teacher-life.

My students have independent reading every day for 40 minutes as part of my school's new focus on boosting literacy. While the program is getting off to a somewhat rocky start, I'm really excited for its potential to give kids the chance to get super stoked to read. They can choose any book, as long as it's at their reading level.

Problem is, my school gave me about 30 books, only about 5 of which my students would have any interest in or actually be able to read.

So here's the solution. I've created a wish list through Amazon of books that are popular in Baltimore, as well as at varied reading levels that reflect the abilities of my students. I know a lot of people out there say to themselves "wow, Joy is great. I wonder how I could help her out in her first year teaching?" Now you have your answer. Browse the list, or add your own. It doesn't matter if the book is used or new, either. It gets shipped directly to me, and I would be eternally grateful!

Here's the link: Ms. Bacon's class library