call me in 62 years (updated)

Lessons from my grandmother over the past four days:

1. "If you play with boys, you can end up pregnant. And a lot of boys are very convincing."

2. Always take the champagne if it's an option. Time of day is irrelevant.

3. Pie makes an excellent addition to any breakfast. Especially chocolate chip pie.

4. When you get older, you should find a younger man, because the old ones are only interested in your money. (I tried to convince her the younger ones were probably only after the money too, to which she responded "but yes they're more clever about it.")

5. Anyone scared to ride a motorcycle is a wimp.

6. Amanda (17 year old niece): "Yeah my boyfriend is coming over later."
Grandma: "So how many do you have?"
Amanda: "boyfriends?...um just one at a time."
Grandma: "oh well that's no fun. You gotta at least double up."

7. (while posing for a picture): "sex and cheese. oh wait, does that mean I have to choose between one? Can't do it."